Cutting Away The Excess - Transcendent Life Tips

The world these days has too much information that is put out there too quickly, it’s like trying to drink from a firehose. As a Dad, it’s more than a little scary to think about the kids today with everything going on in the world and how much they have to process. I’m not saying that I had it easier, after all if you read any of my other blogs you might know that my upbringing was both physically and mentally abusive. I’m not underselling that, but I believe that young people may have it a little more difficult overall, today. We had some similar situations that were scary, like Russia threatening to start WW3. Then there’s the regular things kids deal with like finding their place in the big, and sometimes bad, world we live in. Growing up in my generation seems like it was a little simpler than now, in the sense there is a lot more to process.

People identifying with pronouns and as nonbinary indicates that society has become more welcoming and accepting of how all people would like to be recognized. We are definitely in a more inclusive world, but is it harder for people who identify that way to have to explain it? Is it harder for people who don't understand it to relate? There just seems to be a lot for young people to learn, accept and still try to find their own way.

If young people go to a party and try drugs it may be laced with something that may cause a lifelong addiction or even kill you. There have always been hard drugs, but not with such accessibility and potentially instantaneous dire consequences. I certainly wouldn’t want to go back to abuse, but I may be fortunate to not be growing up now.

I started thinking about a conversation at work the other day with some co-workers discussing the simple moments that transcend the rest of the brutality and excess in the world. Those moments where a song brings you back to your first kiss or driving your first car down by the beach. Maybe it’s the first time you picked up an instrument and started to play, chasing that song you always wanted to learn. The moments that cut away the excess and make you feel like a human being happy to be in a moment away from war, religion and how you may identify. Away from hate or fighting for people to treat you as a human being, in that moment all you feel is whole and happy. The simple times that transcend all the terrible things, that especially today that we are bombarded with.

The youth today tend to go to Social Media when they want to fight boredom and are hoping for inclusiveness. There, they find overwhelm in the form of current events, the opinions of others, keeping up with their peers, and potential online bullying. Previous generations had to be active and creative on how their time was going to be filled. We had to go out to find friends, to find entertainment and find trouble. Today they hide behind their keyboard and can find or say whatever they want. Technology is both a blessing and a curse.

So how do we strip away the excess to get to those simple, but life altering whole moments? I think we need to get back to a few life tips that transcend time and will help you to find those moments, hopefully with greater ease.

I’m not going to number them, because the numerical order of these does not matter. Application should hopefully be all of them, all the time.

Treat People How You Want To be Treated

If you are expecting good things, put good things out in the world. If you feel someone is not treating you properly, step back and ask yourself honestly if you are treating them how you want to be treated. I’m not saying take the blame for every bad interaction, just a little self reflection and clarity. It doesn't matter where people come from, their religion or how they identify, treat them how you would want to be treated. A tip that works no matter how much time goes by or what’s going on in the world.

Never Judge a Person Until You Have Walked A Mile In Their Shoes

My mom had this quote hanging on our wall growing up. Living in a chaotic environment left me looking for positive inspiration anywhere I could find, and I have come to realize this to be very good advice as I get older. Everyone has their own story and you do not know where they have been, or where they might be at the moment. If you find that you cannot help judging them, maybe you should stay clear. It’s not healthy. There are the 1 percent that are truly not good and should face justice. Those are not the shoes you want to walk, so stay clear because you will more than find yourself judging. Most people are just trying to figure out themselves and where they fit, so unless you want to walk their path, save your judgment.

Don’t Compare Yourself To Others

This is not a good practice. It’s not healthy and contributes to a negative mindset and bitterness. Everyone has a different path in life and has started from entirely different points. It is up to each of us to follow our own unique journey. Where were you yesterday, where are you going and how do you improve your situation to reach all the goals you want for yourself?

You Won’t Grow in Your Comfort Zone

Nothing good comes from doing the same thing over and over hoping things will get better and that your dreams will be realized. IT WILL NOT HAPPEN! You have to step away from the things that are holding you back if you want to be successful in your goals. Breaking the cycle of what you have been taught or are in is necessary to see any kind of personal growth. When you are open to change and have the courage to pursue it, the simple unexpected life changing moments will come more. If you want to climb Mt. Everest, whether that is in a metaphorical sense representing your life, or actually set out to do it, you better get after it. Time is nobody’s friend, especially if you waste it. What's your why? Why do you have the goals you have? The next step is how and that is typically easier than you think…if you can get out of your own way.

What do I mean? Someday is not a day of the week, start taking small confident steps to your goals. If you want to climb Everest, go down to your local climbing gym and sign up for a class. If there is a trip you have always wanted to take, book it and start working your ass off to pay it down before you take the trip and you will enjoy it even more. If you have suffered years of abuse, do your research and find a counsellor that is relatable and will be able to give you some tools to help. A counselor who has not had similar adverse experiences will most likely not be able to help you. When you take the hard step to muster the courage to get out of your comfort zone, the simple moments will become the glue in your adventure that becomes important reminders of why you did it in the first place. It will take you back when needed with the power to push you forward with the enthusiasm of creating great memories.

I think it’s time to put the computer down, phone away and take the dog for a walk, maybe get lost in thoughts of my next adventure.